Friday, November 2, 2007

Feel better now.

I feel better after getting a lot of sleep last night. Working nights is really messing me up. At least I am leaving that job.

I am not sure what to make the focus of the blog. I have a lot of stuff going on. I am considering making the focus my infertility journey. Of course, right now I may also blog about moving, and other changes going on. Life is not easily compartmentalized, and it all seems to affect each other. If I do make the focus infertility, I may change the name of the blog.

This cycle will not be a big infertility cycle because I am not doing anything this cycle. I am thinking of not even doing my temps. It is sort of nice not to have to worry about it. I may do my temps toward the end of my cycle just to figure out when my period is due. My cycles have a tendency to be irregular.

With PCOS, weight loss seems to be part of the infertility treatment. So, Hubby and I are doing Weight Watchers. Hubby is doing Weight Watchers with me for health reasons. I have seen too many overweight men in their forties end up on the cardiac unit where I work. I want him around to help raise our children when we finally get pregnant

I have not seen big losses on the scale, though I think I have lost inches, and I feel a lot better. A lot of people have noticed I have lost weight, and my clothes do not fit. Hubby has been doing better dropping weight, though I think he has more to lose. At least it is working for both of us. I just need to keep at it. Hubby likes the way I look since I have lost some weight. He has had a hard time keeping his hands off me lately. And I feel more sexy, to boot.

We are just at the beginning of our infertility journey. It is difficult for me to imagine success at this point. I feel like my period is inevitable every month. I try to remember that we are in the process of getting help for the infertility, but that is difficult for me to remember when I have my period. I think the lack of estrogen during my periods makes me feel really low, and the failure of another cycle does not help my morale. At least my lows are cyclic. After my period is over, my estrogen climbs again, and I start to feel better. It is a rollercoaster, though. Highs can be really high, and the lows are really low. At least for me.

I just finished my period, so I am starting to feel more optimistic about things in general. I can just realx this cycle, and work on other things, such as moving and finding a new job and selling the house. I think I am thinking of this cycle as breathing room.

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